Twelve months

When I look back on the past twelve months, I see a huge difference in myself. I no longer wear the hijab, I no longer carry a shawl with me wherever I go and I’ve actually taken action regarding my life. Change is coming; change is here. 

It’s been a definite bumpy road, but I see how in small ways, the changes I decided to make have led me to where I am today. For that, I am grateful. 

I am grateful that today, I stand by myself with no need to impress someone or please someone for the sake of keeping the peace. I am grateful, that I do not have to pretend to be someone I am not. I am grateful for the career changes I made because I am able to financially support myself independently and keep my passion for writing alive. I am grateful I kept close, the friends and family who have meant so much to me and continue to support me in my hard times. 

It’s easy I think, to lose sight of what matters in hard times. It’s easy to get caught up in unnecessary drama and forget whats important or lose your way. I’ve faltered on so many accounts in the past twelve months but I am grateful I kept steering towards what needed to be done. 

Some days continue to be hard; like today. It was hard and I moped for some hours; I passed the deadline on a due write-up. i daydreamed a little too much and overthought certain scenarios and moments in my head. I try not to give myself a hard time over having the occassional hard day though. I should be allowed to have a few every now and then. I’m only human afterall. 

Life goes on….